I must be honest, until recently I had my doubts as to Donald Trump’s spiritual commitment. Sure, I had occasionally seen pictures of Trump with his eyes closed, within a circle of evangelical ministers, appearing to be deep in prayer while tweeting smears in his pocket.
And it’s true that he talks the talk when dealing with issues dear to the hearts of millionaire evangelical leaders in exchange for the political support of their congregations.
Yet, I still had my doubts. I don’t know, perhaps it was because Trump seems to be the only man capable of breaking all Ten Commandments before even getting out of bed in the morning. Little things like that made it difficult to take his façade of religious fervor seriously.
That is till now.
In one magical moment last Monday on a street outside the White House, it all changed for me as the president boldly strode through the throng protesting police brutality, parting them like Moses in the Red Sea, then standing on the church steps hoisting a Bible, resembling a huckster scalping tickets outside an NFL stadium.
It was that look on Trump’s face as he held the Bible upside-down that really enthralled me. Where had I seen that look before? For some reason, the quote “What, me worry?” kept running through my head.
Then it came to me, like a thunderbolt from heaven, the world was witnessing a miracle — the reincarnation of Rasputin the Mad Monk!
Grigori Rasputin was a Siberian peasant who became a charismatic holy man during the early 1900s. Using his wiles, he eventually became a mentor to Czar Nicholas II and his wife, Alexandra. His enemies suspected Rasputin of influencing Russian diplomacy so assassinated him in 1916.
Like Rasputin, Donald Trump has risen from a struggling young proletariat with a measly million dollars in his pocket to a powerful political figure. Based on Monday’s inspirational photo, Trump is also an aspiring holy man grappling with the great mystery researched by scholars for centuries seeking the correct way to hold a Bible.
There were early indications that an evangelical path was being paved for Trump. One sign was he claimed that the Bible is his favorite book; that is, except when he claimed that "The Art of the Deal" by Donald Trump is his favorite book.
Once asked his favorite verses in the Bible Trump replied, “I wouldn’t want to get into it because to me that’s very personal. You know when I talk about the Bible, it’s very personal. So, I don’t want to get into verses.” Amen, a wise and introspective response one would expect from a holy man.
The one time when Trump did "get into verses" and publicly shared a favorite passage about “bending to envy,” biblical scholars said it does not exist, but what do they know.
When asked if he favors the Old Testament or the New Testament, Trump, in the sage manner of a religious guru, proffered this deeply moving reply, “Probably equal. I think it’s just an incredible — the whole Bible is incredible.”
In contrast to his normal unassuming and humble manner, Trump revealed in 2016 that “Nobody reads the Bible more than me.” An admission which, of course, surprised no one since he appears so knowledgeable concerning Bible verses in both the Old and New Testaments.
Further evidence of Trump’s reverence for his Bible is that while he was outside the church holding a Bible last week, a reporter asked, “Is that your Bible?” Trump replied, “It’s a Bible.” Understandably, he did not want to risk damaging HIS Bible in the turmoil.
Another trait that Trump and Rasputin share is that each man possesses a physical trait which is truly mesmerizing. With Rasputin, it was his eyes which some of his followers claimed were hypnotic.
Trump’s spellbinding physical trait is his hair. When people see his photo, their eyes are irresistibly drawn to his halo-like hair. Watch the crowd sitting behind him at his televised political rallies if you doubt this. The congregation, not understanding a word as Trump evidently speaks in tongues, is nonetheless driven into hysteria by the sight of his hair.
Rasputin’s and President Trump’s lives were nearly mirror images when it came to their love and respect for women. Although he got married and fathered two children at an early age, Rasputin did not let that interfere with his sharing his holiness with other women.
Women flocked to him, and he felt obligated to bless them with his holy and healing touch, a LOT of healing touch. It was widely rumored that he was having sex with his female followers. Historian Robert K. Massie notes, "(Rasputin) would send out for prostitutes late at night as people might send out for pizza."
Donald Trump’s renown for his love of women is the stuff of legend. He has even been known to donate large sums of money to some, only asking in return that they do not publicly discuss his beneficence due to his shy and humble nature and a strong desire to avoid the spotlight.
Rasputin and Trump shared the miraculous ability to communicate with the masses despite some academic limitations. Douglas Smith points out in his recent Rasputin biography, "(Rasputin’s) notes were often scribbled and hard to decipher. His grammar and spelling were atrocious. His meaning was often hard to make out."
President Trump’s meaning is also "hard to make out" at times.
Expressions such as “text massages” “smocking gun” and “global waming” require some careful analysis to decipher. Yet, his divinely inspired skill at inventing new words such as "covfefe" and "infantroopen" is without question beyond the ability of mere mortals.
If readers still are skeptical regarding the fact that Donald Trump is a mini-me, or in his case a maxi-me, of Rasputin, chew on this: Rasputin’s assassins served him enough potassium cyanide to kill a horse with absolutely no effect!
Likewise, it is purported Trump has injected Clorox and Lysol, even devoured tacos using Handi Wipes for shells, to ward off the virus — and the man is fit as a fiddle! Truly a miracle.
Hopefully, Trump’s story will have a better ending than Rasputin’s. After all, one cannot help but be a bit concerned when he considers that a sexually promiscuous peasant helped to bring down the empire of the Tsars in Russia.
Mike Murphy of Pocatello is an award-winning columnist whose articles are syndicated by Senior Wire. He recently published a book titled "Tortoise Crossing – Expect Long Delays," which is a collection of 100 of his favorite columns. It is available on Amazon.com.



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