POCATELLO — In the middle of the night Sunday, friends of Maddie Beard turned the large rock in front of Pocatello High School into a white memorial to the lesbian student who took her own life on Feb. 18.
They didn’t wait for permission from school officials and proclaimed on a video now posted on YouTube that their love and respect for their friend, who was a junior varsity basketball player, made it imperative to commemorate Maddie’s contribution to the school and to honor her family.
“R.I.P. We miss you Maddie Beard. Turbo,” was painted with black on the white rock.
“Turbo” was the 15-year-old’s nickname — earned while she was playing little league basketball in Idaho Falls.
“A coach in Idaho Falls noticed her aggressive play and said, ‘Maddie, this is not a contact sport. You need to ease up, Turbo,’” said Maddie’s mother, Carmen Stanger. “The name stuck.”
Stanger said the nickname fit because her youngest daughter was always going at things full steam as she participated in volleyball, basketball and softball. Two years ago, Maddie had taken up trapshooting with her stepfather, Joe Hollifield, owner of J&J Auto Body in Pocatello. She excelled at the sport and was hoping to land a college scholarship for trap shooting.
“She was amazing,” Stanger said. “She was very strong spirited and strong willed. She stood up for the underdog all the time.”
Family members gathered Monday at the home of Stanger’s aunt in Chubbuck. All said it was the teen’s unwillingness to back down or shrink into a corner that led to her being the center of hurtful comments and bullying by some male students at Pocatello High. Maddie’s sexual orientation had not been an issue during her ninth-grade year when she excelled in class and made many friends.
“She loved school and had a 3.7 GPA,” Stanger said.
As her 10th-grade year, progressed, the attractive student-athlete became the target of would-be male suitors after she rebuffed their advances. Stanger said her daughter had turned down some boys’ offers to take her on a date, which led to verbal taunting.
“She was open about her beliefs,” Stanger said.
Maddie’s 21-year-old sister, Shelby, expanded on what Maddie believed, as the family discussed their loss.
“She believed that everyone should be able to be open about who they are without fear of consequences or persecution,” Shelby said.
Maddie’s 25-year-old sister, Britney, said the fact Maddie’s own family accepted her choices with open arms and love probably made it confusing when Maddie was met with scorn in a school setting.
“They didn’t like the fact she was gay,” Britney said.
Despite the comments at school, family members said Maddie remained upbeat and was always looking to the future. She had plans to either become a firefighter or a police officer. Stanger said her daughter was really looking forward to securing a full driver’s license in July when she turned 16. And Maddie’s fan support for the Denver Broncos knew no bounds.
There were other big family events at play the week that Maddie died. Her grandfather was in the hospital at Eastern Idaho Regional Medical Center and her stepfather was getting ready to remarry. Stanger said Maddie was extremely close to her stepfather and was looking forward to attending the wedding.
On the day she died, Stanger said she had talked to her daughter earlier that day. Maddie had not shared any personal crisis.
“When I got home, I found her,” Stanger said. She said the discovery was like “a bad dream.”
Stanger found herself unable to remain in the family home where her daughter died and has been staying with an aunt.
Now the family is trying to determine what triggered the teenager’s suicide. They said they knew about the taunting and comments about Maddie’s sexual orientation, but the girl had always handled the pressure well.
Stanger and her two older daughters said they do know that Maddie didn’t trust school officials or counselors enough to discuss any concerns with them.
“She didn’t trust any of them,” Shelby said.
Stanger said some of that mistrust stemmed from an incident at Pocatello High School that happened in December involving some senior girls and the use of a vapor cigarette in the locker room. During an investigation by the school administration, Maddie’s name somehow became involved, according to her mother.
Stanger said initially the school officials were accusatory, but later apologized after their investigation cleared Maddie of any involvement or wrong-doing. But the grieving mother said the fact her daughter had been accused and belittled in front of her peers had left a mark.
Stanger said she hopes her daughter’s death will spark some action by administration, staff and students at Pocatello High School. She said her daughter shared how often teachers or administrators would ignore bullying conduct among students — especially when it came to sexual orientation.
Maddie often came to the aid of those being bullied, according to her mother.
“There was always someone she was sticking up for,” Stanger said.
The family held a private funeral ceremony for Maddie at the Manning-Wheatley Funeral Chapel last Friday. They are planning a larger public celebration of the teen’s life on March 15.
Sunday night, the students that Maddie had touched stood up for her in their own public demonstration. In the video of the rock painting project, a male student explains that other students and even teachers broke down in tears when the news of Maddie’s death spread throughout the school. Friends used markers to print the name “Maddie” on their forearms.
“We wanted to show the world how much we miss her,” the voice on the video says.
Stanger said the entire family appreciates what those students did when they decorated the rock and she hopes it remains in place for a while, even though no school permission was given.
As the video narrator says, “If you knew Maddie, she would have done the exact same thing.”